John’s 27th

Today is my dead brother’s birthday. That’s an ugly sentence but for me it is a very ugly truth. My brother is dead and I miss him every day of my life especially on his birth and death day yearly. 

I have talked to other people who have lost loved ones. We aren’t all date fixated, that is more likely to miss the lost loved on on a certain date, but many of us are. When it comes to my brother, I find that nearly all of my immediate family is. 

I had an errand to run at my parent’s house today.  (Due to a long complicated backstory that is too heavy for this post maybe too heavy for this blog my parent’s house is where Daughter lives as she attends college)  I am moving extremely slowly due to my current RA flare and before I could even get myself and my walker out of the car to get into the house, Daughter came out teary eyed and said to me,”It’s John’s birthday.” 

I (suddenly a little teary eyed myself) said,”I know.” And then, pointing to the radio,” Neil Young and before that AC/DC.” 

She smiled. “The DJ on ZLX doesn’t know it’s his  birthday! Just us.” 

For some reason, whenever I miss John the most it seems whatever media is closest to me tends to play music that he loved. He had a diverse and sometimes eclectic taste in music. I don’t think that there’s anything especially supernatural about that, it just seems to happen when I’m saddest and it DOES comfort me. 

On the way home, the dj on ZLX announced their Perfect 10 promotion, in which they have listeners submit a list of ten songs and if your list is picked they will play it, you get to be guest dj for that spot and you get a t-shirt. On a whim and cause I was missing John and needed to be able to do something with my feelings, I entered.

Here is my list. The site actually asks for 13 songs, your top ten with three alternates. So here goes:

  1. Ripple– The Grateful Dead
  2. In Memory of Elizabeth Reed–The Allman Brothers
  3. Another One Bites the Dust– Queen
  4. Joe’s Garage–Frank Zappa
  5. Roadhouse Blues–The Doors
  6. Black Water–The Doobie Brothers
  7. Dirty Deeds–AC/DC
  8. Harvest Moon–Neil Young
  9. Roadhouse Blues–The Doors
  10. I Wanna Be Sedated–The Ramones
  11. Comfortably Numb–Pink Floyd
  12. Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream
  13. The Wall–Pink Floyd

There is no rhyme or reason to the order of that list. It’s just simply a list of songs John liked in the order that they occurred to me that also fit the under the umbrella label of classic rock. Now that I’m looking at it and I’ve submitted it to the station other titles are occurring to me as well as other artists. I should have included some Creedence. And maybe picked more then one title from the Allman Brothers. Oh well..  It would be really cool if they chose me. Just a small way to honor my baby bro.

And since it would probably be too tedious for anyone who isn’t me to watch a video for each song I chose I’ll just post one of his favs here today. 




2 thoughts on “John’s 27th

  1. I’m sorry for your loss. I’m glad you’re writing about it though. I know writing can help people express their grief. Thank you for following my blog. Make some crafts or read a book to cheer yourself up, okay? 🙂


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