Insomnia and nerves..

Once again I am up in the middle of the night, in pain with thoughts that won’t shut off. I have a lot coming up next week. Son starts basketball, we have his IEP meeting, the pain clinic, SSI review, Suboxone doctor.

Son’s supposed to have his friend sleep over on Saturday. Because we just got back from Virginia and the house is a shambles of presents and suitcases and bins of stuff. It’s chaotic and I’m exhausted and I just want to be left alone, not clean up and make sure that there are functional groceries and clean sheets on the sofa bed.

The movie I’ve never heard of that I have playing in the background is getting interesting..kind of..

So.. the pain clinic.. last month when I went to get my Suboxone refill I told the doctor how much pain I’ve been in and he referred me to the pain clinic. His exact words were..”Go, see him..you don’t have to suffer.. you don’t have to take the Suboxone.”

I have no idea what this means. If it means I can get narcotics, like real pain relieving, quality of life giving narcotics, what will be the failsafe to keep me from throwing away everything for the almighty craving.

Seth Rogen was skinny in this movie.. maybe that’s why he isn’t funny.

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