He is REALLY getting on my nerves. He has the car all the fucking time, can’t be bothered to help me with, nor take me to SHIT, and the one thing I ask him to do for me today, he forgets!
My medicine is sitting at the pharmacy because he wants to putter around Walmart. Must be nice. To be able-bodied, do whatever the hell you want with your free time after you spend the day pursuing your dream.
I am so angry. And I feel trapped. I don’t have anywhere else to go, or anyone else I can truly depend on.
He complains as he sees me inching toward my goals of wls that I’ll get skinny and leave him for someone else. Lately he’s had me so angry that if I COULD have walked out, I would’ve. Not for someone else, just for my own place with Son. But when I think that through I remember how miserable Son was before when I was separated from Husband.
No matter how much I tried to pack in the visits and phone calls etc, Son still cried every morning and night when he missed his daddy. That definitely puts a pause in my idea of separation being the ideal it feels like.
So I swallow my rage, usually washing it down with sugar or fast food. And I wonder how much I can take before I break.